In meeting all of these different people at social gatherings and events, and now having an obvious belly, the talk turns to babies quickly. The questions and comments are usually similar but always have the same hidden meanings. I'm here to help and inform. The following is a list of questions or comments, their real meanings and my answers.
Do twins run in your family?
Did you use fertility drugs or treatments because you were having trouble conceiving?
I have a beautiful uterus and Josh is a sharp shooter. What can I say?
How far along are you?
I want to judge if your fatness is what I think is appropriate for the weeks pregnant you say you are.
I'm almost 21 weeks. I've gained about 17 pounds and consume more sugar than is suggested. I'm assuming each of my kids weighs about 8 pounds now.
You look great!
For a pregnant person
Thanks! You should see the acne scars on my back!
Do you have names picked out?
How stupid are the names you picked out?
I think we're sticking with Hocus and Pocus.
Are you going to be a stay-at-home mom?
Does your husband make enough money to support you and two kids?
Well, I'm probably going to work from home. I have this great Ponzi scheme you might be interested in.
Are you planning on breastfeeding?
You're a horrible mother if you give your child formula
I'm totally excited about becoming a human cow.
And speaking of breastfeeding and pumping, I'd like to show you a beautiful picture I found.
|What the Eff?|